all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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