Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize