I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
