ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I just gift wrapped bread.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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