shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
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drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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