glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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