so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
we made out on top of his cat.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
