What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
