The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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