Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize