I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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