You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
