You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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