She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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