i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
