how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
