But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
