so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize