He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
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I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
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And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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