Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
