So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
my shit smells like andre
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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