did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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