weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
