Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
