so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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