he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
