you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
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We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
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I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.