you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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