After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
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I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
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it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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