There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
