And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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