Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize