I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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