giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
