I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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