Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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