That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize