The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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