Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I DEMAND FORESKIN
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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