Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
