She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
