If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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