so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
