Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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