Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
