I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
