We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
