The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
