What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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