Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
