2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
