My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize